Without fault in His eyes

My Pastor at church has spent the recent weeks teaching us about the seasons of Faith. There are different levels of faith and different tests call for a different kind of faith. One of the verses covered yesterday truly spoke to me.

Romans 8:18 For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us.

It has been my motto, so to speak, in life to never have regrets. I am who I am today because of the decisions I have made in life. The right decisions and the wrong decisions. I am who I am today because of the things that life has thrown at me. I make it a point to intentionally try to forgo feeling ashamed of my mistakes, ashamed of my trials. Whether I am in the midst of a storm because of a series of mistakes I made or because life just happens sometimes, I take the same approach and have the same attitude. I am an open book. If I must endure this time of my life to benefit another person later on, then so be it. If I need to suffer through some things, that suffering is a small part compared to the glory that is given to God in order to support another person through the same or similar situation.

I have spoken previously about a miscarriage I had before my twins were born. Not long after my miscarriage, a very close friend of mine also suffered a miscarriage. I was the first person she called when she got the news. We cried together and I just loved her. I was grateful to have gone through the miscarriage first so I would know what to say and how to attempt to comfort her. My suffering and trials don't compare to what my experience can offer another person. The support, love, compassion, and understanding that can be lent to another person in the midst of their own struggle.

My blog didn't start with that purpose but that is the direction my blog has taken. When I feel led to share a story or an experience in my life through this blog. I am happy to. I trust that my words are guided and those in the midst of struggle can read what God has done in my life and find hope. We are here to serve God and further his kingdom. What can you do today to bless someone? If you know Jesus today and he dwells in your heart, share His good news with a friend or co-worker today.

I can live a life free of shame and condemnation because the bible promises that if I accept Jesus as my Lord and Savior and repent, turn from my old wicked ways then I am forgiven. I am saved. My sins are as far as as the east is from the west. They no longer exist.

Ephesians 2:4 Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes.

That is a powerful verse. If Jesus sees no fault in us after we have repented then why do we both to carry our heads low and relive our mistakes over and over and over again. So if you are feeling condemned today. Simply as for forgiveness, repent, just say, "I made a mistake." That's all you have to do. Then Jesus will wash his hands of it and it's gone. You are forgiven, now forgive yourself, and let go of the shame.

I will leave you with this...Ephesians 2:2 May the God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ give you grace and peace.

Lana - you are truly and deeply missed as much today as the day we learned you are now with Jesus. Sto Lat princess, Sto Lat! Today we don't cry because we miss you, we celebrate your life and the motto you carried with you; seize life.

Where the heck is your blog, lady?

Well, I am human and must humbly admit the imbalance in my life. There were signs and a slow build-up of a disconnect, still, I just got smacked in the face with it because I refused to adhere to the warning signs. I guess I have always been one to not take the advice of others and have always been more of a hands-on, do it and learn for myself kind of person. Let me just say, at the first hint of God's voice, be obedient!

I placed too much emphasis and priority in catering to my clients that my portfolio became more important than my family and even superseded my devotional time. My family would have been the first to notice the change. I've been cranky and tired and impatient and irritable. I started to notice my own irritability and soon weakness followed. I am nothing and useless without first seeking Christ. I need his refreshing daily to keep me full and strong in every area of life.

I continued along this path for two weeks now ignoring everything around me. I even got boastful enough to think how cool it was that I didn't catch any of the colds from my lil' kiddos. Too much of anything isn't a good thing and we (Todd and I) had too much freedom and fun last weekend. So my week started with a bladder infection which is now a full blown kidney infection complete with nausea, vomiting, chills, a sore back, oh and the insatiable need to pee. I apologize for the graphic nature of all that. I'm ticked at myself. I know better.

That explains the fewer posts over the last couple of weeks. I won't be taking anymore evening appointments and will only photograph on Saturday. The number of sessions I take per week will be limited. My family needs me, they depend on me so I need to have time for them. More importantly, I need to be my best for them and my clients and I need time with the Lord first in order to be my best.

I've been struggling with a few personal relationships lately and how to handle each situation. My study time today was pretty clear, consistent, and to the point.

"You will never be called upon to give anyone more grace than God has already given you." Max Lucado Whoa! That got my attention. I don't really feel the need to follow that up with an explanation or background. It speaks pretty well all by itself. Judge and you shall be judged. Walk in love. Forgive.

Matthew 7:4-5
How can you think of saying "let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye" when you can't see past the log in your own eye. Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then perhaps you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend's eye.

I am not perfect. If I'm going to spend some time sharpening my critical skills, I should begin with myself and ensure I am free of faults before I concern myself with other people's faults. That should keep me busy for oh, a lifetime.

I'm off to get my munchkins from preschool. I'm hoping to have a restful afternoon and lots of cuddles before I have to run to our evening commitments.

Walking in love,
Kari

I'm going to call this one, count it it all joy Friday!

We have pretty quickly settled into a routine. Faith even sleeps past 6:00 a.m. of late. Mallory and Hailey are pleased as punch to go to school everyday. They have Friday's off and just hate that they couldn't go to school this morning.

Boy, I did forget what morning time was like from the last school season. Every girl in the house has a turn with the tears, if I'm lucky. Most mornings they each just take turns all morning. It's really ridiculous actually. I can't tell you how many times Tyler's shower has been interrupted by his sisters potty runs first thing in the morning. It's not fun in the moment each morning but I laugh about it later on each day. Most people wouldn't survive a single morning in this house. My mom does a lot of road work for her job and it allows her to work at home. She's been gone by 6:00 a.m. most mornings lately; I wonder why?

My twins and I walk up to get Faith and Karli from school each afternoon and leave Tyler to his tinkering in the backyard with Grandpa. Most days Faith and Karli come running out with a new friend for me to meet. "Mom this is so-and-so, so-and-so, this is my mom." "Hi, so-and-so, nice to meet you." Which is always immediately followed by "will you be my friend?" and "will you be my friend too?" from the peanut gallery which is Mallory and Hailey. I wonder if Faith and Karli's friends realize that when you become friends with one of them, it's a four-for-one deal? Ah, it's so much fun though.

Polish dance started again last night with tons of new students. We have 26 kids in the first group alone which is all pre-school and kindergartners! Sounds fun, no? Our Director was the Artistic Director at the school we all left and has been doing double duty for the past three years. Running a new dance school, which is now the largest PRCUA dance group in the nation, and coordinating and creating new costumes in too big a job for one person. This is the first year she has taken on two costume assistants, yours truly and another wonderful lady. It's going to be a big job but I'm really excited about it. I'm looking forward to helping the new moms with the wealth of costume information they will be bombarded with in the coming weeks. I'm very proud of the time and effort I put into my children's costumes. They each own their own regional costume from the region of Krakow in Poland made of authentic polish pieces from Poland. I'm very proud of it. I just want to pass on a bit of that pride and assist the other moms. I'm looking forward to getting to know them and their children and mingling a bit more. Not my forte'. Not because I don't like people but believe it or not, I'm painfully shy! It's hideous really and I despise it.

I just feel really good about so many things. Todd and I are on a financial plan to get us to the end of this chapter so we can start a new one. All the kids are transitioning very well and socializing and making friends. Tyler has made more friends in two weeks then he did in four years at the old school. I'm so relieved and proud of him for conquering his fear. He's even beginning a bit of girl chatter. Oh no! Quick change of gears: his health teacher did a survey and wanted to know how many kids are allowed to go to the movies with friends. Tyler was the only one that didn't raise his hand. Sorry, I don't find it ridiculous to tell your children "no" sometimes for their protection. I want to ensure he is equipped enough to resist temptation to make a mistake when the temptation comes and I'm not convinced he's there yet. So for now, no movies! Besides, he wouldn't be allowed to watch any of the movies his gentleman friends would want to see. He is 13 but we don't necessarily allow him to watch all PG 13 movies. Guard your heart, eyes, and ears. Garbage in, garbage out. My husband's favorite words!

This seems to be sort of a jumble of things and I'm all over the map but I'm just full of joy and excited about all the good things happening and the many things I have to be thankful for. May His blessing continue to be upon us and more importantly upon you!

I'm going to leave you with a verse I read this morning over at Consider It All Joy by Cindy that just exudes from my soul this morning.

Psalm 100
Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth. Worship the Lord with gladness; come before him with joyful songs. Know that the Lord is God. It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture. Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations."

September 11

It's September 11th. I want to make mention and keep in prayer those who lost loved ones on that horrible day. I will always remember exactly where I was. Todd called me at home to let me know about the first plane that crashed into the first tower. I never watch the news. It isn't a rule or anything. I just don't watch it. There are some things in the news that are unavoidable because they are so huge. For instance, I live about 45 min. outside of Detroit so Kwame comes up a lot. Need I say more? Anyway, I sat on my coffee table, indian-style, in front of the TV and was just utterly shocked at what I saw. Moments into watching and listening to the reporters frantically try to decipher what happened, I literally watched the second plane crash on the TV at the very moment it occurred. A feeling of utter panic and disbelief washed over every portion of my body. This was obviously not some fluke accident but something terrible was happening. It wasn't long before my neighbor came to the door. Tyler and her daughter went to school together. We stood in the door and cried together. For the people that were already lost. And, because we had no idea what was to come. We walked up to the school together and pulled our kids out. My TV remained off for the rest of the day. I didn't want my children to be exposed to that kind of scenery, panic, and terror. To this day, they have only seen glimpses of what happened in New York that day.

Two people come to mind when I think of September 11th. My grandmother and Jodie Metz. We lost my grandma to a battle with cancer on September 11th but prior to 2001. I lost Jodie five days before her sixteenth birthday. She was at a youth camp in Colorado and just collapsed and died suddenly. Both were beautiful, faithful woman who knew and loved the Lord. I'm certain they were in heaven on September 11, 2001 waiting to receive the lost.

It all still seems so fresh and so painful. I didn't lose a loved one that day. But, that doesn't make the events any less senseless. We live in a tough world today but God is in control. That doesn't mean he approves of the senseless acts that people perform. It just means he has a plan. Oddly enough, although he hates their sin, he still loves the man who commits the sin. Whether we got caught up in a gossip triangle, robbed a bank, or blew up the bank, he still loves us all the same. Sin is black and white to God. It's all measured the same. His forgiveness is equal. He is no respector of persons. He is a gentleman. He is love. So regardless as to who becomes President, or what natural disaster occurs. It will all end the same. Jesus will return for those who love him; for his bride. He will offer a last chance to those who have denied him and I pray harder than I've ever prayed for anything that if you don't yet know Jesus, you get to know him, fast! We don't know the day or the hour but if you look at the world around us, we have to assume it won't be long.

If you have not been born again and this is your first visit to my blog you may think I've fallen off the loony truck. My own friends and family will tend to agree with you. I'm not loony, I promise. My life has been revolutionized by my faith, my relationship with Jesus, and the blessings he continues to poor upon me. I used to be stuck in a dark and depressing place and felt captive there. My mind has been renewed and every bit of me is filled with peace and joy. Did I earn it, no. No one can earn what he has to offer. Do I deserve it. No, we are human, created with a sin nature, not one of us is perfect and not one of us deserves what Jesus has done for us. But, I do have a revelation of his love and forgiveness in my life. I whole heatedly receive them both. From it, I've gained healing, physical, emotional, and spiritual healing which brought self love. Now I love my friends and family more freely and more deeply.

Who knew that one of the world's smallest books would become the greatest source of encouragement for me. Yes, I have to take you back, yet again, to the His Princess Love Letters from Your King book by Sheri Rose Shepherd. I have this book for my girls also. I highly recommend it for young girls! There is no better time to build their self esteem and no better way then for them to have a revelation of God's love for them at a young age.

My Princess...
Fill Your Home With Peace

I know how hard it is for you to feel content in your home when you're always wanting one more thing to make it the perfect place. I long to give you beautiful things that turn a house into a haven of a home, but, My princess, you must first learn to let Me build in you a place of peace and contentment. Do your best to rest in Me and wait for Me, and then I will give you what I know will benefit you the most. I want you to make your home a place that builds relationships and reflect who you are in Me. Remember that your loved ones need you more than any material thing. So decorate your home with joy, fill it with timeless memories, and create a safe place to grow up in Me.

Love,
Your King and your Resting Place

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled. John 14:27 NIV

In closing I want to mention all the wonderful men and woman who serve in our military. We may not all agree with the war. We may not all agree with its continuance. We may not all agree as to why the war even began. We may not all approve of the Commander in Chief. But, I'm certain we all agree we want every single person who has volunteered their lives for this country. Those who are still with us and those who we have lost. Whether they sit behind a desk or serve on the front line. They have each stood up and offered their lives for our protection and freedoms. Thank you especially to my little brother Murray who serves in the United States Marine Corp. He is currently stationed wayyyy too far away in Okinawa. He is the epitome of a Marine and I am so proud of him! I am equally proud of my sister-in-law Lisa who has to be separated from her family and remains committed and in love with my brother through it all. You are stronger than you know! I love and miss you guys!

Sorry, just had to whip out my feathers like a peacock real quick and show of my pride for this country and the men and women who serve for us.

This week's recap

This week has been very different for me. Many days with two solid hours of total peace and quiet. All my children were away at school. My youngest ones in the care of a perfect stranger. They have each had a great week. As I suspected, they are each very well rounded, well adjusted, confident, and independent.

Tyler is entering 8th grade in a new school. His final year of middle school and Monday night, the day before school, brought much anxiety for him. Tyler was pretty emotional, nervous, and actually down-right petrified. My husband quickly put us in a circle, joined hands, and he led us in a prayer over each of our children. Thanking God for his angels that work overtime to protect them and for His peace that surrounds us as we each transition into new journeys. We then surrounded Tyler and all laid hands on him. Todd asked that each of us pray individually over Tyler. We've never asked this of the kids and it was so awesome to hear from their hearts and good wishes for their big brother. They each loved it so much, they all had to have a turn having hands laid on them. Faith followed it up with a new scripture she learned in children's church.

I have been a shy person by nature my entire life. When I first started doing sessions outside of friends and family I would make myself sick the solid 24 hours before the session. So I told Tyler to do what always settles me. Say "thank you Jesus for filling me with your peace that surpasses all understanding, and I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." By the time I get to my session, I'm ready to go.

After I embarrassed Tyler pretty sufficiently at the bus stop that morning he did find himself throughout the day quoting the scripture he'd been armed with. I'm so proud of him!

What did I do to embarrass him? What any good mother would have done of course. I saw a young man/teenager approaching the bus stop with is iPod in his ears. I asked him what grade he was in. "8th grade" he replied. So I told him Tyler was also in 8th grade, "we just moved here this summer, and would you mind hanging out with him today." "Maybe sit with him on the bus and lunch time, that sort of thing." Tyler looked at me like 'oh my goodness mother, what is WRONG with you!' Well the nice young man introduced himself, the two shook hands, and before I left I ruffled his hair and kissed him on the cheek. He he! Tyler politely asked me when he got home from school that day to "NEVER DO THAT AGAIN!" I can't make any promises but I'll try. It was all a secret ploy to embarrass him on purpose so the two could relate to each other and have something to talk about. Guess what, it worked! They shared a seat on the bus and talked about how horribly embarrassing their mothers are!

Now if I can get Faith to sleep past 6:00 a.m. and quit waking the rest of the girls, we'll be in good shape.

Vacation Photos

First Day of School

All the kiddos headed back to school this morning with a smoother transition than I expected. We had a slight hiccup with Tyler last night. He was, as expected, feeling very nervous and overwhelmed. We covered him in prayer, gave him a couple of scriptures to hold onto, and sent him on his way. He spent a good portion of his first day waiting in the cafeteria for his school schedule but all else proved to be a very good day for him.

Faith and Karli had a competition with how many new friends they made. Mallory and Hailey just had a bit of an orientation tomorrow so their first official day is tomorrow. Prayer is a powerful thing, God guides our days, and covered us all in peace. While all the munchkins are gone tomorrow, I'm making brownies!

I of course have to share the first day photos...