tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48477536550041505572024-02-20T21:10:24.512-08:00Finding My Place In This WorldKeeping my focus on my Lord, family, purpose, passions, and gifts.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.comBlogger140125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-19305594603490135722010-04-05T09:59:00.000-07:002010-04-05T10:02:06.523-07:00My personal blog is on the move...Although I do love the convenience blogger offers my followers from blogger and Facebook, this blog spot just doesn't work well for me anymore. So, I'm combining my personal blog and photo blogs together. Same me, same content, more images, so why not continue to join me?<br /><br />You can find all my current and future blog posts here: <a href="http://www.karidawsonphotography.com/blog">www.karidawsonphotography.com/blog</a><br /><br />Goodbye blogger!Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-26368289982142704892009-10-11T11:28:00.001-07:002009-10-11T11:29:00.384-07:00Lord, Change Me.<p class="MsoNormal">I bought a book once, never read it but had good intentions. It was called the A Woman’s Journey towards God or something along those lines. I have gobs of books that I bought with good intentions and never even cracked them open. I also have gobs of books I bought with good intentions, started them, and never finished them. And more still that I’ve cracked open and gotten several days into more than once and haven’t yet finished them. Today marks a new journey for me. One I’ve begun before but always seem to leave behind after a few days or weeks effort. </p> <p class="MsoNormal">Today I found myself feeling completely overwhelmed and like I’ve lost all control. The point is that I’m not really in control any way, right? Isn’t it my job to do the praying and let God do the doing? The vast portion of my stress at the moment comes from a total loss I have in how to get through to my teenage son Tyler. I really feel like we’ve done everything right. Yet still his choices are disappointing. My husband bought this book for me, of course, The Power of a Praying Parent. I first discovered its companion, The Power of a Praying Wife and my husband owns The Power of a Praying Husband. I actually said out loud last night, “I need to find a book.” I thought I needed to find a book to teach me how to deal with my son; how to get through to him. Well low and behold, I HAVE the book! Prayer, I realize now, shouldn’t have been my last resort but my first step. The order of our lives should be God first, marriage second, and children third. It’s no secret I consider myself a selfish person and one who is tough to live with so my priorities are often out of line. I’ve known for years that I’m not as nurturing as I’d like to be, or as affectionate, patient, loving, or kind even. Anger and frustration seem to always be my first line of defense. The hubs and I are on day 8 of The Love Dare from the movie Fire Proof and I believe my husband is praying for me daily. Even if I don’t pray for him daily, a deeper love for him grows in me more each day because of his prayers for me. So this morning before I cracked my new parenting book, I cracked open my bible. In the process I also jotted down some scriptures I have highlighted so that my son can look them up and we’re going to talk about those together. Something I should have been doing with him since before he could read but the bible promises restoration <b style="">(Joel 2:25)</b> so I don’t think it’s too late to start. I then started, yet again, from the beginning with The Power of a Praying Wife and How to Make Your Husband Feel Loved. </p> <span style="font-size: 11pt; line-height: 115%; font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif";">I’ve had these doubts about my personality, these defaults I carry with me each day that have a profound effect on my husband and children daily, and not in a positive way. I know all too well though that in order to get to the joy, you first have to go through the pain. In this case, it’s the pain of change. Personal change. My prayers today and each day following must start with Lord please forgive me and Lord change me. Certainly both of those are going to hurt. The notion to correct these defaults does not come from shame or guilt but from a gentle conviction that only the Lord can deliver. Only the Lord has a way of pointing out your faults so blatantly and honestly without reproach yet leaves you with a feeling of determination, commitment, and peace without shame or guilt. So today marks the beginning of a journey I’ve begun before and will continue to begin over and over again until that change finally comes. Not change in my husband’s attitude or behavior or in my son’s attitude or behavior but change in me.</span>Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-7202698532490409672009-09-29T06:51:00.001-07:002009-09-30T06:21:35.188-07:00Selfish! Who's selfish? Me?A war has been waged against selfishness in me. I'm selfish. It isn't a characteristic I am proud of, however it is one that I have not held as a secret here either. The battle began last week when I heard just ten minutes of one of Joyce Meyer's messages. I also saw last week an episode of Joyce Meyer's that I had seen before. Only, I didn't realize I had already seen it until at least ten minutes into the broadcast. With that came a revelation that it is not merely enough to just HEAR a message. There are times in our lives that we need to get a lesson so badly that when we find scripture that will help us maintain our battle through to victory we need to study it, meditate on it, read it aloud, memorize it, and put it on sticky notes on every surface of our homes until it's finally permanently written on our hearts. It isn't enough to hear it once. Change never comes in one day or hearing a message one time. You know it takes a person an average of performing an act for forty days before it becomes a habit. You have to spend some time on any given subject to really reap the benefits of change and effectiveness in your life. It comes to no surprise that The Love Dare from the movie Fireproof is forty days in length.<br /><br /><br />Day 1 - The book explains love as being built on two pillars, patience and kindness. So day 1 begins with patience. Learning to hold your tongue and walk in love and not allowing our anger or frustration to be alleviated through our mouths in the form of harmful words. "Anger almost never makes things better. In fact, it usually generates additional problems. But patience stops problems in their tracks...patience is a deep breath." I love this part: "It stops foolishness from whipping its scorpion tail all over the room."<br /><br />What causes frustration? Selfishness. What causes anger? Selfishness. What causes the vast majority of any and all arguments? Selfishness. We aren't hearing what <span style="font-size:180%;">we</span> want to hear or the other person isn't doing what <span style="font-size:180%;">we</span> want them to do. <span style="font-size:180%;">We</span> aren't getting what <span style="font-size:180%;">we</span> want. Webster defines selfish as being <span style="font-weight: bold;"></span><strong style="font-weight: bold;"></strong>concerned excessively or exclusively with oneself <strong>:</strong> seeking or concentrating on one's own advantage, pleasure, or well-being without regard for others. Do you know there is actually no fulfillment found in being selfish? As Joyce Meyer would say, "we get wound up every morning like robots and wander around saying "what about me, what about me, what about me."" But, there is no pleasure in it. We were created to be servants and we find fulfillment in having a servants heart and meeting the needs and doing for those around us. I'm telling ya, I consider myself to have been highly selfish, yet I was miserable!<br /><br />More on how we did on day 1 and the days following, as we did day 3 this morning, later. In the meantime, the scripture I'll be putting on sticky notes in every room of my home is this. <span style="font-weight: bold;">Philippians 2:3 Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves.<br /><br /></span>And, how about a little assignment for you? If you want to spend some time reading and thinking about true selflessness check out the book of Philippians after you look up the above verse. Read maybe just the first chapter. Paul is a man that was filled with the Lord's love from the top of his to the toes of his feet. Wanting to stay alive even in imprisonment for the sake of others. If given the choice between going home to the Lord of remaining alive and imprisoned, he would choose imprisonment so that more lives with be touched by the good news. That is what it looks like to be Christ like to be filled so overflowingly with His love, to be unselfish that a person would praise God in their suffering because they know it is for the benefit of spreading His love, forgiveness, and salvation. WOW!<span style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></span>Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-75574067868673995372009-09-29T06:05:00.001-07:002009-09-29T07:00:43.562-07:00Not Just ANY Key!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_I5sAw5gkZtM/SsIGb5pzARI/AAAAAAAAICk/SSpHKPzW5xY/s1600-h/019+copy.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 268px;" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_I5sAw5gkZtM/SsIGb5pzARI/AAAAAAAAICk/SSpHKPzW5xY/s400/019+copy.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5386875180690899218" border="0" /></a><br />Key, a means of access control or possession. This is a key. It's the key to my husband's new Allstate office. It isn't just a key, it isn't just a key to an office. A key can also be defined as, a notched and grooved, usually metal implement that is turned to open or close a lock. No, not just any key but the key to our future. I'm overwhelmed with pride for my husband. For his guts, for his faith, for his trust in the Lord, for his ambition, for his means to access, control, and possess our future. And, not just our future but the future of our children and grandchildren. Hope I'm not pouring on the pressure Todd :) Just kidding. When I started my business there were so many days I wanted to quit and Todd was used as the implement that pushed me off the cliff. Literally, there were days he forced me to forge ahead and not quit. I stand behind him in every manner possible and if necessary force will be used. I have no doubts that while fear may try to rear it's ugly head from time to time I won't have to use force. Todd has an extraordinary will to accomplish his goals and his mom has always said "he never did like to hear the word no."<br /><strong></strong><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 153);">Isaiah 22:22 </span><br />I will place on his shoulder the <b>key</b> to the house of David; what he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"></span>Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-85008177409576437722009-09-25T07:25:00.000-07:002009-09-25T07:52:24.081-07:00Make Every Effort to Keep Yourselves United in the Spirit!Ephesians 4: 1-6 NLT<br />Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God. <span style="font-size:130%;">Always be humble and gentle</span>. <span style="font-size:130%;">Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults</span> because of your love. Make every effort to <span style="font-size:130%;">keep yourselves united in the Spirit</span>, binding yourselves together with peace. For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you have been called to one glorious hope for the future. There is one Lord, one faith, one baptism, and one God and Father, who is over all and in all and living through all.<br /><br />Paul is speaking to the body of Christ in this passage, however I find it especially key in a marriage as well. We all lead such busy lives allowing our schedules, jobs, and commitments to stand in the way of precious time together. Perhaps that is a grand assumption but I know for my life personally, this is often the case. I take special care to ensure my clients get what is promised to them in the manner of time of which it has been promised. As my husband begins his new business, I'm certain the same will be true for him. We're both in a service industry. I take special care also to ensure my children are prepared for each day, that they feel loved before leaving my side for the day, and getting them on time to where they need to be. I do spend many hours in the week at home alone now but much has already filled the empty spaces of my schedule. I'm not a priority and my marriage has not been a priority. The hubs and I are having date night tonight and I can't remember the last time we shared a meal alone. He's working late and the kids have places to be so there are many nights we don't sit together at meal time at all. This is a temporary season for that and he has my full support to do what he must in order to get his business running. Dinner time used to be one of my favorites times of day. It's been such a rush lately and I miss the laughter, our family games, and hearing about everyone's day.<br /><br />In the hustle and bustle of our daily lives how do we keep ourselves strong? How do we keep our marriage strong? I do believe that keeping our inner man strong should be our first priority. Spending time with the Lord each day to pray and listen and worship is what we were each created for. I have a trivet my dad bought me that says "7 days without prayer makes one weak." Weak, not week. I can't afford NOT to be in his presence. We can only feel our best and OFFER our best if we are spiritually sound. The Lord's presence fills us with a super natural peace and joy and the more it becomes a daily party of our lives we are blessed with revelation and nuggets we need to accurately pray for those around us. I cannot be a good wife and support my husband and meet his needs if I'm running on empty, mentally, physically, and spiritually. Your marriage will dry up real quick. Yes, I speak from experience. Is it enough to ensure we are solid as a rock inside to develop an amazing relationship with Jesus and not have communion with our mates? Do we HAVE to pray together? Absolutely, YES! MAKE EVERY EFFORT TO KEEP YOURSELVES UNITED IN THE SPIRIT! Straight from the bible.<br /><br />The hubs leaves for work much later than he used to so it has afforded us the time to have breakfast and a cup of coffee together in the morning. If we push the clock back and get up just a bit earlier we'll have more time, private time, together in the morning to start our days fresh and right. We made an attempt to get through The Love Dare from the movie Fireproof some time ago and didn't get very far so I'm hoping to spend our mornings in God's word together and in prayer and in having time alone when the house is pretty quiet and the TV is off. I'll keep you posted on our discoveries and share with you how it's going.<br /><br />You always get the truth with me here. Those who know me personally often believe I'm a strong tower and I have it all together and I even make it look easy. But, to be honest I don't have it all together. I think I push it down and pretend to be to keep from falling apart. I'm grateful to have a roof over my head and food on the table and clothes on my back for me and my family. However, I'm not gonna lie. I dream of the day when I feel like we've got our fresh start and I have my family back. I enjoy my parent's company and so appreciate the huge help they have been on so many levels over the last year; however it just isn't the same as having your family in your own space. I think we all still feel a little disjointed and in the last year we've lost track of a lot of things we used to enjoy as a family and I'm afraid our bonds might be loosened a bit too much. It could just as well be anxiety from all the change that has recently occurred. Tyler in high school, Faith in middle-school, my babies are in school all day and ready to give up their security blankets any day. I have to daily fight back the urge to reign them all back in.<br /><br />So make time for the Lord, make Him your center and the center of your marriage and family! Don't take for granted those you have around you and assume you'll always be able to get by. My husband has a heart of steal and patience beyond measure and he is the glue that has kept us together. But, day by day another thread gets weaker and weaker. I can no longer expect that his tolerance will last forever or that our marriage void of daily communion together and before the Lord will last forever without it. For us, even when things aren't 'great' they're still pretty good so I'm looking forward to going back up a few notches, looking forward to restoration, looking forward to falling in love again.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-17478986365946575672009-09-10T05:56:00.000-07:002009-09-10T06:21:14.286-07:00Wow where has the time gone?I can't believe I haven't blogged on a personal level since May! I initially started by blog for me. I then started my own photography business, became addicted to <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">flickr</span>, and managing my business and it and before long I felt like I didn't have time to read the other blogs I enjoy. I felt as though the blog world is a comment for comment type thing. I'm going to continue to blog for me as a creative outlet and to hopefully reach others through my own personal challenges and trials. There are blogs I do love and read and enjoy when I can. If you enjoy my blog and you want to be a follower and leave blog love I certainly appreciate it but please don't be offended if I don't return the favor. In my life the Lord comes first, my family second, my clients and business after that and when I have time for myself to blog and catch up on others I will.<br /><br />Anyway, on to what's really going on in my head this week. My oldest son Tyler started high school this week. I drove him to school his first day and even though he was trying to smile, he's just like me, he wears his emotions on his face; he just can't hide it. What I saw absolutely broke my heart and I empathized with him so much my eyes flooded. Behind his half smile was sheer terror and panic. A brand new school, probably the smallest student, and he had no idea where he was going and knew he'd be forced to ask teachers for assistance all day. As a freshman, that just isn't cool or so I'm certain he was thinking. Tyler's attending the same high school I went to and driving from the same home. It seems like just yesterday I was ripping up the roads like Mario <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Andretti</span> taking the same route in my Dodge <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Daytona</span> and yet the day has arrived that my first born is in high school. I'm actually contemplating home-schooling to avoid this feeling of my heart being ripped from my chest everyday.<br /><br />Faith started middle school and in true Faith style, it's all gone off without a hitch. She is just cool as a cucumber, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">uber</span> confident, and settling into her new routine like a pro. She hops out of bed immediately and makes sure her body, teeth, and room are all clean and still has time to spare. Tyler's schedule before he leaves collides with Faith but they just stay out of each other's way and I never hear a peep between them.<br /><br /><span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">Karli</span> is in her last year at elementary school and she is <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">geeked</span> to the sky to have been chosen for Safety Squad. She also eats lunch early so she can help out the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">kindergartner's</span> in the lunch room during their lunch. In the lunch room each day <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Karli</span> will find my babies. Yes my twins are in all day kindergarten! They have separate teachers which happen to be at polar opposite ends of the school which isn't fun but we're figuring it out. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">Karli</span> last year could barely get her self together and I often times had to follow her around the house to ensure she was ready on time. This year, she's got herself together and even though I'd prefer she not, she insists on helping Mallory and Hailey. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Karli</span> is showing significant signs of maturing and responsibility; it's a miracle people!<br /><br />I'm doing my best to make sure Faith does what she needs to do upstairs while <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Karli</span> is still sleeping and when <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">Karli</span> gets up they switch to try and avoid each other as much as possible in the morning. I'm not sure what it is about the pair of them but at this point, they just clash. I feel blessed to still be at home in the morning to walk them to school, although I have to admit, that walk home by myself is brutal. Hopefully that anxiety and temptation to just bring them home with me everyday will subside and soon.<br /><br />I've been very busy shooting this summer and maintaining my photo blog. The hubs graduated with his bachelors degree in May and finally finished up his final class in July. Wow was that a tough season. Then August 28<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12">th</span> was his official last day at General Motors. We decided together to mutually separate from GM and we're in the process of opening up an Allstate Insurance Agency; doors are slated to open December 1st. I'm committed to making this a family business and intend to be Todd's office manager until we have our processes and procedures hammered down and things running like a well oiled machine. So Allstate will become a priority over my business. It doesn't mean my business and clients won't get the same top notch they get now, it just means I'll likely be shooting less and booked farther in advance. At least for now. I'm certain our family has some growing pains and some challenges again but nothing we can't handle. And, on the other side of it all lies the promise land.<br /><br />For those of you who've followed my blog for some time may way to know our finances continue to look better and better all the time. We've accomplished a lot in the year we've been out of our house and have big goals set for the near and distant future. We've stepped up our <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13">commitment</span> in the service arena at church and fully expect that the Lord is preparing us for me as our church prepares to obtain a building of our own and grow leaps and bounds in the coming years. Todd and I are both excited to see where God takes our church and how he plans to use us in the process.<br /><br />I've missed you blog land!Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-49825135715079769402009-05-12T07:21:00.001-07:002009-05-12T07:23:23.561-07:00Joyce Meyer MinistriesThis morning I watched the most moving Joyce Meyer broadcast and just had to share: <a href="http://www.joycemeyer.org/ourministries/broadcast/">Joyce Meyer Broadcast</a>. It is WORTH the 30 min. of your time!Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-43301740215250290532009-05-06T06:35:00.000-07:002009-05-07T07:34:14.465-07:00Awe-Summm!As I mentioned yesterday, Melissa over at Home is where your story begins passed this Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Summm</span> award onto me! I always knew I was a queen! Yes, I feel super special! After you finish getting your daily dose from me, you may want to head over to Melissa's blog, check her out and let her know you stopped by. Melissa and I found each other's blogs and connected through I Heart Faces and I just adore her sweet spirit. And, while your at it check out Carrie (cool name, I know) over at <a href="http://martinmanorhappenings.blogspot.com/">Martin Manor Happenings </a>as well.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUQSdalu4pq0_Uw4jm6ivCmGrsvHy8fELmFXHxJCozf0mfKAbPa5ub8Yhnd4aibcnTlUOosg5Vaj2SRT_K07k27wWabrk66NFTx5j07NzfvMKjLt3G2kHIGD7ZhSuQ9YAyJlOSQ8XGxbRn/s400/awesummm+award.gif"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 150px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 236px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUQSdalu4pq0_Uw4jm6ivCmGrsvHy8fELmFXHxJCozf0mfKAbPa5ub8Yhnd4aibcnTlUOosg5Vaj2SRT_K07k27wWabrk66NFTx5j07NzfvMKjLt3G2kHIGD7ZhSuQ9YAyJlOSQ8XGxbRn/s400/awesummm+award.gif" border="0" /></a>Now... I am to list 7 things that make me Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">Summm</span> and then pass the award on to 7 <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">bloggers</span> I love. Make sure to tag the recipients and let them know they have won! Also link back to the Queen that tagged me.<br /><br /><br /><br />1. My five kids are not the sit-behind-the-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">tv</span> or play-video-games-all-day kinda kids. They have energy, lots of it! The very last thing my kids need is sugar. So I try to keep my kiddos eating as health as I can. I pick up things like Honey-Nut Cheerios and Cinnamon Life cereals for breakfast. I'd love to make the move over to a multi-grain waffle. I buy tons, and I mean tons of fruit and they always eat it all up. My girls take salads to school for lunch much of the time. I prefer they snack on yogurt and string cheese. I'm not totally rotten though and I have a <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">rampid</span> sweet tooth of my own so I do buy a few 'delicacies' for <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">their</span> lunches. So I feel Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">Summm</span> when I come home from the grocery store and my kids overwhelm me with thanks and love and hugs and kisses because I bought <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">Nilla</span> Wafers and applesauce!<br /><br /><br /><br />2. This is NOT easy! I don't know that there are too many things I can say I are so cool about me that I'm awesome or that I do that make me awesome. I don't want to be <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">haughty</span>. But, when Monday comes to a close and my laundry is done and my there is a full week of freshly pressed stuff in the closet for the hubs; I'm Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">Summm</span>!<br /><br /><br /><br />3. Talking my daughter <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Karli</span> into trying out for the Talent Show at school by herself instead of relying on a friend due to stage fright without her even knowing, I think that makes me Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">Summm</span>! <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_12">Karli</span> is super talented and such an entertainer. She's stuck dead middle in our family and I wanted her to have some light of her own. Auditions are today. She chose <em>I Might Even be a <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13">Rockstar</span></em> by Hannah Montana because, well, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14">Karli</span> is a <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15">rockstar</span>!<br /><br /><br /><br />4. Tyler has had a rough year finding his place at the new school and adjusting. He's pretty shy and doesn't have a very good self-esteem and got pretty weary about it. So being the Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_16">Summm</span> mom that I am, I gave him a fresh, super cool and stylish haircut so he's super handsome and updated his wardrobe with a few pieces from those designer shops that he thinks he "has to wear."<br /><br /><br /><br />5. I do have four other kids to clothe though so we picked up the brands he wanted and saved a ton of money by hitting the clearance section at the perfect time and hit up a resale shop that carries those brands as well. Making a teenage boy feel more confident about himself while spending the same amount I would have at Target; that's Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_17">Summ</span>!<br /><br /><br /><br />6. Paid off a car this week, uh yeah, that's Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_18">Summm</span>! Thank you to a Lord who <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_19">supplies</span>, my hard working hubs who is disciplined, and the IRS!<br /><br /><br /><br />7. This final one isn't really about how Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_20">Summm</span> I am at all. It's about how Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_21">Summm</span> the hubs is to me and how Awe-<span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_22">Summm</span> my <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_23">bloggy</span> friends who keep me going are!<br /><br /><br /><br /><div align="center">I now pass this dazzling award on to:</div><br /><div align="center"></div><br /><div align="center"><a href="http://ericamarie00.blogspot.com/">Erica</a> - Happy Anniversary girl!</div><br /><div align="center"><a href="http://leslieautumn.blogspot.com/">Leslie</a> - One of the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_24">loveliest</span> ladies in blog land and wise beyond her years!</div><br /><div align="center"><a href="http://tabbielynn.blogspot.com/">Tabbie</a> - How she always knows just where I am!</div><br /><div align="center"><a href="http://jenvphoto.blogspot.com/">Jen V</a> - Check out her awesome photo blog! Jen is super dear to me!</div><br /><div align="center"><a href="http://our-rockstar-family.blogspot.com/">Melissa</a> - Who I hope is continuing on her road to restoration!</div><br /><div align="center"><a href="http://www.consideritalljoy.com/">Cindy</a> - Super sweet lady!</div><br /><div align="center"><a href="http://thestanleyclan.blogspot.com/">Becca</a> - Love staying up-to-date with her family!</div>Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-31429601126824877122009-05-06T06:15:00.000-07:002009-05-06T06:35:53.884-07:00What are you so angry about?I opened up my e-mail to find a super surprise from Melissa over at <a href="http://clem4fam.blogspot.com/">Home is where your story begins</a> who donned my blog with a sweet award, more on that tomorrow...<br /><br />I've been thinking a lot about anger and unforgiveness lately and what it does to the relationships around me. I read a quote yesterday, "the greatest power a person possesses is the power to choose." Each time our brain recognizes or produces a feeling we have a choice to make. In the case of an offense or anger we can choose to deny that feeling. <em>Ephesians 4:26 Be angry and sin not. Do not let the sun go down on your anger</em>. It's okay to get angry, it's okay to have our feelings hurt, it's what we do with those emotions that we need to be careful about. It's a tough thing to decide that when you get angry about something big or small that you'll go to the father with it first and foremost, he is the one we can vent to. Then allow the Holy Spirit to guide our next steps. Often times, we want to go straight to the source and let em' have it! But, the Lord on the other hand will request that we forgive immediately instead. It's acceptable and often times necessary to still discuss the issues you have with the other person but do so carefully and with love. Ask the Holy Spirit to intercede and guide your words and your conversation. Walking in love is not an easy thing to do. It isn't a natural part of our make-up, our character, it takes work. Just like we need to exercise our muscles and bodies, we need to exercise our reactions, forgiveness, and walking in love.<br /><br />The sad part truly is the stronghold even a small thing can have on a relationship. Lack of communication causes strife and allows to much room for each person to make assumptions. Isn't it so easy for us to always assume the worst of another and make the problem so much larger in our own minds? Be angry and sin not. No matter how small and silly the matter may seem you must communicate with the person(s) involved to resolve issues. Small offenses gradually build on top and they become really super huge issues and graduate to a point where neither party can nor wants to relate to the other's point of view. If you let it go long enough, it becomes too late in some cases. If you let it go long enough, one party or the other might quite, just might get to a point where they can't imagine a peaceful solution and build walls around their heart. Where do you have anger and unforgiveness in your life today? Is it a dad who is angry with a son? A wife who feels taken for granted? A family member who has offended you too many times? A husband that feels neglected. Meditate on that for a while today. Ask the Lord to reveal to you any area of your life where you need to forgive, search your heart, and ask the Lord to reveal to you also <em>who</em> <em>you</em> may need to seek for forgiveness. Ouch! I know.<br /><br /><em>Acts 10:38 And you know that God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and with power. Then Jesus went around doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil, for God was with him</em>. Jesus went about doing good because the Holy Spirit was with him. We are anointed with the same power and have access to the same Holy Spirit, go about today doing good to all today.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-65847700597684578732009-04-29T07:20:00.000-07:002009-04-29T07:46:02.789-07:00I've chosen a path, no longer luke warm, starring at the fork in the road.Wow! I can't believe it's been nearly a month since my last post. I got a little burnt out from trying to cram too much into each morning and took a necessary break. I've been in the word, the hubs and I are in agreement on a few things, and have chosen a path instead of continuing to look at the fork in the road.<br /><br />I've had a few things stirring in me for some time and the hubs and I have made some preliminary decisions but continue to pray about them to ensure we're in the will of God before we make any commitments. We've been praying independantly but it's time for corporate prayer. We're praying a lot about our home church and the area of the state in which we'll continue to raise our children because the two are certainly connected. I also feel as though we are being called up, preparing for change or for promotion. But, before we can be relied upon there are a few things we need to change at home both personally and on a family level.<br /><br />I've said before that I've been saved for more than ten years but I didn't surrender and commit to a relationship with Jesus until January, 2008. I've been learning more and more how to walk in the spirit and follow peace to remain within the will of God. There are a few things that won't change very soon because although we know they will change, we aren't released to do so yet; like where we live. Todd and I have each had our own independent devotional time and personal relationship with the Lord but have yet to really incorporate them together. And, although we each pray for our children and pray general prayers with them before meals and bedtime we haven't <em>really</em> prayed with them, not specifically or specifically enough. We also need some devotional time with our children so they aren't just studying on their own but it's a corporate family activity. God is calling us to <em>be</em> a Godly family, to walk in the spirit together and to truly train our children in the Lord and prepare them to be Godly adults and not just <em>look</em> like a Godly family.<br /><br />If any of you follow me on Facebook you will know I quoted Joyce Meyer this morning who said "much like we have to wind up the alarm clock to prepare us for the day, the first thoughts we have while lying there in the morning wind us up for the day." Much like we have to set a clock, we need to set our minds! It's time to make a decision once and for all to get our hearts right, to get our body's right, to get our homes right. Once you make up your mind to do something, nothing can detour or persuade you otherwise. It's time to get fit in mind, body, and soul and teach our children to do the same. It starts first thing, every morning.<br /><br />If we get ourselves right the rest will fall into place. I know this through personal experience. We have always had an abundance of grace and mercy upon us and I can only image as we go deeper in the Lord how much richer our lives will be. I'm ready to be called up, to get promoted. I'm ready to not only be a hearer of the word but a doer also. I'm ready to be used by God. I didn't endure all that I have in my life just to accumulate a testimony that will never be shared. God uses everything for his glory. I'm ready to be used! Send me!<br /><br />Hebrews 12:14 Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord.<br /><br />I am salt and light but those who are not holy will not see it and will not be seasoned if I live a mediocre, luke warm life.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-2739645167554548722009-04-07T06:42:00.000-07:002009-04-07T07:11:14.418-07:00Peace be with you!My family had the craziest month of March. The hubs had an insane school schedule attending every Monday and Tuesday evening, after working all day. Two weekends out of the month he'd take Friday off work to attend school for eight hours on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. He always had assignments that needed to be completed when he arrived at class on Friday, assignments due on Saturday and Sunday, followed by a final project due one week after the weekend class in addition to his regular studies for his Monday and Tuesday classes. All five kids danced in their polish dance recital on April 4th which was a three hour program. The kids had dance for four hours on Thursday and Friday evening to prepare. I had the bright idea of being costume mom this year which I truly enjoyed but it was a lot more time consuming that I thought it would have been. Tyler and Karli performed in five dances which means five different costumes for each of them, Faith in six, and the twins in four each. In addition to ensuring the costumes pieces for all my own children were perfect, I was busy sewing and hemming for lots of other families as well. Truth be told, I let the crazy schedule take over and haven't spent much time reading the word. I swear, my soul was so dry, my bones ached!<br /><br />So, I set aside some time for me this morning, for the Lord actually. I watched Joyce Meyer whose message was about our path to living in peace. The first thing she said was "Are you confident? Do you like yourself?" I am and I do. But, had you asked me yesterday, my answer may have been different.<br /><br />You see, if your mind and heart are not filled with the spirit of God and His word, it will be filled with something else. What's circling in your thoughts today? What lies are you listening to? Are you consumed about how you'll pay your bills, if you'll keep your job, how you rate and compare to wonder woman who lives next door, or how your tomatoes rate compared to hers? One of my all time favorite scriptures! <em>Philippians 4:6-7 Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God's peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.</em><br /><br />I've made mistakes and there are times when I face them daily and ponder on them. I think about my failures. I found the more time I spent away from the word the more preoccupied my thoughts became with my mistakes. I was feeling like a lousy person and a lousy mom and a lousy wife because I have failed them in some ways. But, today! Today I can say that I am confident and I do like who I am. I'm aware of those mistakes and I'm not proud of them, but I refuse to let myself be held in the bondage of shame and guilt.<br /><br />We need to get in agreement with what the Lord says and thinks about us and quit agreeing with the devil! We are the righteous of God on Christ and he loves us! <em>2 Corinthians 5:21 For God made Christ, who never sinned, to be the offering for our sin, so that we could be made right with God through Christ.</em> Not because of anything I did or you did, not because we have earned it or that it's even possible to be earned, but because of what Jesus did.<br /><br />So how do we get that peace? To start, we need to quit spending our time trying to control our circumstances and learn to control ourselves! Then, we chase peace, it doesn't just fall upon us, we have to seek it out and determine to put it on! <em>John 14:27 "I am leaving you with a gift - peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don't be troubled or afraid. </em><br /><em></em><br />We become patient when we learn to exercise patience, we grow wisdom when we learn to exercise wisdom, we gain peace when we learn to exercise peace. When we determine to not throw a fit over every little thing, to not get upset, to not disagree all the time with every decision another person makes or does that we don't agree with. But when we decide it's time that we cannot control what other do, what others think, we can't control the milk that has already spilled and command it back into the cup. When we decide to choose peace, to not act outwardly, breathe deeply and say I'm trusting Jesus. Easier said than done, I know. I'm like the queen of let's get upset about everything and control and change our circumstances but I'm committed to this journey to peace for me and for my family.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-30046408132756611442009-03-24T11:22:00.001-07:002009-03-24T11:22:59.470-07:00A Thousand Splendid SunsI must warn you, this post will give away details of the book so if you are reading or want to read it, don't read this post.<br />While reading a blog, written by I can't remember who, she mentioned the book A Thousand Splendid Suns written by Khaled Hosseini who also wrote The Kite Runner which I have not read. She was looking for the next "it" book. She read the Twilight series, as did I, which left us both thinking about it for days and even weeks after completing the series. So, she was looking for the next book that could hold a candle to Twilight and found it in this novel. The hubs happened to be at the library when I read this so I asked him to pick it up. I had no idea what it was about and when I read the inside leaflet of the hardcover, I wasn't sure I was going to like it. But, the reviews were amazing. So, I picked it up and read over 170 pages in the first day.<br />I love to go through my books with a highlighter to save the sections that really appeal to me and found myself quite frustrated because I can't use a highlighter in this book that has to go back to the library. So instead, it has lots of yellow, sticky, flags sticking out of it.<br />To give you a brief idea, the book is about two different generations of characters growing up in Afghanistan and crosses the Soviet invasion, the reign of the Taliban, and post-Taliban. The author has a magical way of hiding historical fact in his glorious writing and really gives you a feel for how hard life was and is in Afghanistan for the people who live there.<br />The first part of the story revolves around Mariam Jo and begins in her ninth year of life. She is a child that was born out of wedlock so she and her mother are a disgrace to their family and the family of the man that created her. Mariam Jo's father keeps her and her mother stowed away in a very small home outside of both major nearby towns but he comes to visit once per week. He is a wealthy man but has supplied them with only bare essentials. What I find ironic is that it is common in the culture, at least in the 50s for men to have more than one wife and this man, Jalil had two wives and ten other children all living in his home. The first sticky in the book is in regards to Mariam Jo and her father.<br />"When it was time for Jalil to leave, Mariam always stood in the doorway and watched him exit the clearing, deflated at the thought of a week that stood, like an immense, immovable object, between her and his next visit. Mariam always held her breath as she watched him go. She held her breath and, in her head, counted seconds. She pretended that for each second that she didn't breathe, God would grant her another day with Jalil."<br />Despite her mother's anger and rantings against Jalil, Mariam was a small child hopelessly longing to be with her father. You will suffer with her as she learns that everything her mother warned her about is true. Her father is ashamed of her and she is a disgrace. Her life alone with her mother is the best her life will ever be, at least in the first portion of the book. As part I draws to a close her mother has already committed suicide and her father has forced her to marry a fat, smoker, near his fifties, though she is only fifteen. At first she is scared, homesick, and misses her mother but a slowly she begins to connect with her husband. She finds herself full of hope and love when she gets pregnant with her first child but it's shattered when she loses this child and eight more and her husband becomes abusive. In their four years together he has kept her isolated, unable to be friends with the woman in the neighborhood because they are "modern" and forces her to be covered from head to toe when she leaves the home. When he entertains his male friends, she must stay in her own room; she doesn't share one with her husband.<br />The second sticky is the last in part I and I've come to the point where she is completely incapable of doing anything that pleases her husband. She has been accused of being incapable of preparing a decent meal and ruined the rice. Her husband has strewn it everywhere and storms out. When he returns he forces her to chew a handful of pebbles, breaking two of her molars, to inform her of how badly her rice tastes.<br />"Good," Rasheed said, His cheeks were quivering. "Now you know what your rice tastes like. Now you know what you've given me in this marriage. Bad food, and nothing else."<br />I'm just about finished with part II and I promise it's a bit more hopeful than part I but in many cases, not. The the hopelessness of the history of this country is almost hidden in the background because of the powerful bonds the author shares with us. It's an amazing book and for a woman who isn't college educated or up to par on history, I'm smarter for it.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-45858578367252778702009-03-20T06:26:00.000-07:002009-03-20T06:40:32.636-07:00Small Things Part IIITyler has a "girlfriend" and we have a discussion every single day about this relationship. He's approaching fourteen and I set my expectations and boundaries very clearly. He is way to young and immature of mind and emotion to be holding hands and if I ever catch his lips on hers, his butt is mine! And, in my opinion, a true gentleman has the utmost respect for all girls and woman which is why when Tyler deleted one of <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Karli's</span> favorite shows from the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">DVR</span> list he was in big trouble. It's petty, immature, and disrespectful! TV is unimportant so I did have a chat with <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2">Karli</span> about not getting so upset about it, it's just TV, it doesn't matter but for Tyler to take action just to spite her is unacceptable and not the way the Lord intended us to treat each other.<br />God's word is very clear, men and woman alike are to keep their eyes, thoughts, and actions pure. So, we talk about things every day so the boundaries stay clear and ensure he doesn't get too close to crossing them. Temptation is not <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_3">fought</span> while holding the cookie jar, you have to lay the <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_4">temptation</span> at the alter before you even get near the cookie jar.<br /><br />Without giving away all our secrets, Tyler understands that he will reap in his marriage what he sows as a young man. I've been teaching him to open the door for me, for his sisters, and I encourage him to treat Jessie the same way. To carry her books and/or backpack and to know that he can be a true gentleman without crossing those boundaries. In the end, she will respect him more for this. We talk about how girls might behave if they don't feel loved at home to ensure that he and Jessie <em>both</em> are not seeking false intimacy and love in places outside the home. When he asks if he can go the movies with her, it's a rhetorical question because he already knows the answer is absolutely not. He knows he won't be wondering around the mall with her, or any of his friends for that matter, any time soon. I will allow him to attend a dance after school for now. But, when it comes to high school, you bet your bottom dollar I'll be a <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_5">chaperon</span>! The principles and foundation of a Godly relationship and eventually marriage have been clearly defined for Tyler since birth and I trust that when he achieves the age of maturity he'll be capable of making good decisions. Let's be honest though, teens are completely incapable of determining consequences and it's my responsibility as a good parent to form guidelines and boundaries to keep him from being faced with temptation that he is just not mature enough to handle. I'm not yet confident in his ability to say "no" to certain things yet; not because I don't trust him but because he just isn't ready.<br />Last week, Tuesday he informed me when he came home without his sweatshirt that it was because Jessie was wearing it. "She was cold" is all he said. Well, being that I'm teaching him to be a gentleman and all, I actually think it's okay but I could be wrong here. So later he tells me "I learned that each person has their own unique scent. Jessie said I smell good and it's not the Axe mom, so maybe it's that, maybe she's attracted to me because of my unique smell." Ah, yes, the small things, the small moments. I do adore them. I think he's just cute as a button although, he'd die of embarrassment if he ever heard me say that. For now, I find it to be harmless and having been a teen myself, not all that long ago, I'm happy with the boundaries we've got in place. I think we've given Tyler enough freedom to be himself but not enough room for him to make mistakes that can't be undone. Not to mention, the hubs has a really keen sense when things are off or wrong so that combined with prayer and mother's intuition leaves me feeling pretty confident in my decisions. I find it funny though, there are some that will have the opinion that I'm way to harsh and still, others who think Tyler shouldn't even be allowed to consider a relationship with a female at this point in his life. But, for our family, I think we've found a balance and as long as the hubs and I are in agreement, what more could I ask for? I do have a sneaky suspicion though that raising a teenage boy is going to be a cinch compared to my girls. I wonder if I'll still appreciate those small moments then? Wonder if the hubs will? My poor hubby, I don't think he has a clue what he's in for! The hubs has been telling me for years "don't sweat the small stuff." I think I've arrived, but there could soon be a day when I'll be giving him a dose of his own medicine. Let's hope not.<br />Tyler is struggling a bit in school, still getting acclimated to the new school, finding his place there and building upon the friendships he's made this year. His grades have slipped a bit. Tyler just got his braces on Tuesday followed by a fresh haircut. I'm hoping that combined with a new season of sports and more extra <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_6">curricular</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_7">activities</span> that his self esteem will be boosted over the next couple of months. He plans to try out for the football team to play in high school next week which I think is a great idea. The team practices and works out in a weight room all summer. So if he's a part of the team then on that first day of school he'll feel more confident, will have formed stronger bonds with friends and made some new ones. So hopefully he'll enter that first day already feeling like he's a part of something. I'm a firm <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_8">believer</span> that the more involved kids and parent's alike are in school the easier it is for kids to feel free to be themselves and feel accepted by others and the bonus of that is, better grades! It took me until my thirties to not be hung up on other people's opinions and not care whether I belonged or not so I don't expect him to get it at this point. I remember all to well how tough high school really can be.<br />My husband will continue to keep Tyler in prayer and seek the Lord's divine <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">intervention</span> to help him seek healthy friendships, to feel confident, and perform well <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">academically</span>.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-53323757622722449252009-03-16T09:27:00.000-07:002009-03-16T09:28:02.797-07:00Small Things Part IIThere are tons more small things like the way Mallory squished herself onto the dining room chair with Tyler to eat her ice cream and he didn't mind. The way I caught Mallory in my rear view mirror checking out the scenery out the window and fiddling with her hat. I love watching each of them, when they don't they're being watched. The way Hailey goes from child to child each morning confirming they are still her "best friend." The way Tyler rides his bike up on the days Karli stays after school for book club so Faith doesn't have to walk home alone. They way Faith helped me make dinner, had no idea what she was doing, and it still tasted good. The noodles were totally stuck to the bottom of the pan though. And, the way she asked if there was anything she could do to help clean up, even though she helped me make it.<br /><br />One thing I often don't appreciate is how ridiculously long it can take Karli to get something done. Tuesday after book club we had dinner and between the hours of 5:00 p.m. and 8:00 p.m. she had to get her room cleaned up, put her clean clothes away, and make sure she got done any homework she had. Her room wasn't really messy, her bed needed to be straightened a bit and she had a few items of dirty clothing on the floor, no biggie. I know how ridiculous it is for a child to straighten her bed before she sleeps in it but whatever, leave me alone. She didn't have any pressing homework, just working on a few things that are due later in the week, I love that about her, but it still took her all three hours to do it. I'm a zip, zip, boom, boom kinda person that doesn't mess around so I can't relate to this poky mentality of hers but I'm really starting to appreciate our differences and encourage her to do it her own way. This makes it very hard for me to not lose my cool when it's five minutes before we need to leave for school and she's still in her p.j.'s and she's been up for an hour and a half. But, I love her and everything doesn't have to be done the way I would do it. Seriously though, she does keep a hairbrush in her backpack because she almost always has to brush it on her way to school. Sheesh!<br /><br />A bit more on Tyler tomorrow!Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-69353949981612571362009-03-11T10:32:00.000-07:002009-03-12T05:21:43.640-07:00The end of my childhood...Writer's Workshop, sponsored by <a href="http://mamakatslosinit.blogspot.com/2009/03/your-assignmentshould-you-choose-to_11.html">Mama Kat</a>.<br /><br /><br /><br />Well, I guess it comes to no surprise that, that moment would be when I was the ripe old age of seventeen and gave birth to my first child. Yeah, yeah, I’ve chatted about it from time to time here on the good ole’ blog so you all already know how young I was. But, I thought I’d delve a bit deeper here.<br />Although we didn’t attend the same high school, I still consider the hubs to be my high school sweetheart because well, I was in high school after all. One summer the not-the-hubs (at the time) was expected in the Washington D.C. area for a family wedding and decided he wanted to bring me along. The week before, I was expected to go on vacation with my family; camping in Tennessee. So the not-the-hubs came with me on my family vacation; sounds like a good plan for a sixteen-year-old in love no? Anyway, we camped with my family then took a Greyhound to the D.C. area. It’s about an 8 hour drive that literally took 24 on that God forsaken bus! Not fun times I tell ya. I’m positive that vacation is what clinched our future together, okay it’s when Ty was conceived.<br />Skip ahead to the fall of 1994, I was in my senior year of high school and just broke the news to the not-the-hubs. That same night I HAD to tell my mom. I’ve never really been very good at keeping secrets. Apparently, it wasn’t a secret at all, she knew before I did and was just waiting for me to tell her. Dad who was already sleeping was stirred and knew something was up, but mom covered for me until the next day. So dad gets home from work the next day and we decide we need to fill him in. We ask him to sit down and he says, of all things, “what for, she about to tell me she’s pregnant or something.” Uh, yeah dad, you stole my punch line!<br />My parent’s made it clear this is not what they had hoped for but I had their full support behind me. My mother-in-laws reaction has been erased from my memory. I can’t honestly remember a thing she said. But, she was nice to me, supportive when we got married and she’s always been one to tell me like it is, none the less, I’m sure she felt the same as my parent’s. It wasn’t so much what they said but let’s be real, this was their worst nightmare!<br />There was a lot of nausea, a wretched kidney infection that kept me in the hospital for a week and out of school for the remainder of the pregnancy (my doctor was a saint), lots of nights begging Todd to stay instead of running free with his friends, one really bad Chinese dinner where it wasn’t just nausea, and a couple of baby showers. I got so thin in the beginning, the girls at school started to tell me I looked good! If only they knew!<br />While lying in that hospital bed, the not-the-hubs proposed to me and asked if he could be the hubs. It was Valentine’s Day. So Tyler was born in May, I graduated high school (with honors might I add) in June, and we were married in August of 1776, I mean 1995.<br />I will never forget the instant, unequivocal, unconditional love I felt for that boy and still do today, both of them actually. Todd was quickly ushered out of the room before his head hit the floor but he returned shortly. He didn’t leave the room quick enough though because dad who was waiting very impatiently outside the door had been informed that the baby was born so he thought he’d let himself in. For you moms, having just given birth no more than three minutes ago, having your dad storm the room is not the perfect timing. Thank God for those sheets that hung in front of the doors! Shew, my dad was spared a lifetime of his own nightmares.<br />Tyler was perfect but, my butt was still huge, I felt like the” well” that fed the kid would hurt for the rest of my life, and I just may never be able to sit again. But, Tyler was perfect. Our parent’s were perfect, except for when they overstayed and/or turned a short visit into a houseful of guests which often included a meal as well. They did it out of love though, this I know.<br />My fiancé’, our new baby, and I lived in the basement at my parent’s house until after the wedding when we bought, you guessed it, a double wide! Actually, it was only a single but I couldn’t resist. My life sounds like a country song for pete sake! It was our home and we really loved it. Too bad that was all we loved. The rest really isn’t even worth mentioning because it was just pure misery. Fighting over who’d change the diaper, I worked, Todd didn’t. We had no idea what the heck we had gotten ourselves into and we were a hot mess. This was definitely the most trying time of our marriage. I wanted to quit and throw in the towel each and every day. I thank Jesus daily for Todd’s persistence, strength, patience, and perseverance. I also thank Him daily for finally getting a hold of our lives. I can just imagine the mess it would be had we been left to our devices.<br />Tyler was a strong-willed little bugar from the very start. Full of life and energy and the eagerness to touch everything he was supposed to. To find out what all the rules were so he could intentionally break em’ all. Thank God that all changed after he turned five. Since then he’s been such a sweet boy with a sweet spirit and a tender heart. He’s been one we could always talk to. Enforce consequences when he breaks the rules but he responds quickly and reverts back to the proper path. He truly is a good boy. He’s naïve for his age, not a bit street smart at all, and I think he’ll always be a mama’s boy. I don’t mind a bit!Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-54883231081925867542009-03-11T06:18:00.000-07:002009-03-11T06:55:18.711-07:00The Small ThingsWhen I first left my full time job years ago to stay at home with the kids, I was anxious, I felt like I had no idea what I was doing, and really lacked the confidence that it could even really be done. I thought for sure I would screw them all up and in some ways, I'm still afraid I have. The hubs worked 12 hours per day, 7 days per week. I won't lie, the days were looooong; I couldn't wait for Todd to get home. The weekends, worse. I spent a lot of weekends hanging out at my parent's house so I could still at least be surrounded by other adults. Mind you, at this point, I just had Tyler, Faith, and Karli and the idea of having another, let alone twins, was non-existent! It just wasn't gonna happen people!<br /><br />I realize now in looking back, I was young and naive and all that propaganda but the bigger picture is I was selfish. I didn't want to put for the effort it took to play games, to keep them from arguing, to give them an outlet to release their energy, and I sure didn't want to cook dinner. I didn't mind doing everything else that was necessary around the house and at the time, I even preferred it to getting on the floor with my kids.<br /><br />With the birth of the twins, after the fear of never shutting my eyes again disappointed, I was so full. I had so much peace and so much joy. We had very little in terms of a house and fortune and well, not much has changed there, but the Lord has been faithful to supply our every need and we really have what's most important, a strong bond, a biblical foundation and Christ as the center of our lives. Over the years, I have become more and more domesticated, as the hubs likes to put it. I take the brunt of the responsibility for almost everything that makes our home function. I'm the wife and mom and really am aware that ministering to my family is the calling that is first and foremost in my life. Don't get me wrong though, the hubs is pretty fantastic and very reliable, even in a pinch.<br /><br />The more I pray for my husband and children, the more I am filled with this supernatural love. An even bigger desire to care for each of them, to spend time with them, and notice and appreciate all the small stuff. The joy of the Lord is truly my strength. My eyes have been wide open lately, so I thought I'd share a few of the small things with you. I think I'll have to break it into a few posts though because there's a lot.<br /><br />Saturday, it was just the girls and I, the hubs was at school and Tyler spent the day with my brother and sister-in-law. We headed to Sam's Club to do our grocery shopping. We headed first toward the restroom and walked past a lady handing out samples. She asked Hailey if she wanted it and if she liked peanut butter and chocolate. Hailey was being shy, so she said no. The lady thought Hailey must have come in on a spaceship, and said nearly as much to her. Faith walked away saying "oh nice, nice thing to say to a child, that was inappropriate." She's so protective but it fills my heart. So, as we continue to the restroom Hailey hears this lady continue to go on about her sample and says "it taste like a candy bar." I caught her saying this earlier when we first entered but didn't catch the second time around but Hailey must have because she said quietly to herself "candy bar, I should've said yes." It still cracks me up today. She's such a funny girl! So I didn't take her to get a sample of the candy bar/energy bar thing they were giving out but they did have some samples of strawberry shortcake whipped up that she loved. My girls LOVE shopping on the weekends because they always leave full. It's a thing about Sam's Club they picked up from Grandma Ofiara. Yeah, we're a goofy bunch. It is such a<br />small moment and would have gone unnoticed this time last year but I'm grateful for the small things.<br /><br />It is praying for each other that really connects us and I'm so glad to finally have the full revelation of that in my life.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-28385720180337883762009-03-09T11:13:00.000-07:002009-03-09T11:43:09.401-07:00Tagged and a miracle eventTagged by <a href="http://tabbielynn.blogspot.com/">Love's Story</a>!<br />Here's how it works:<br />1. Go to your Picture Folder on your computer or wherever you store your pictures.<br />2. Go to the 6th Folder and then pick the 6th Picture.<br />3. Post it on your bloggy and tell the story that goes with the picture.<br />4. Tag 5 other glorious peoples to do the same thing and leave a comment on their bloggy tellin’ about it.<br /><br /><p><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_I5sAw5gkZtM/SbVcwAoYIXI/AAAAAAAAFuE/aXwYOdcztOI/s1600-h/003+copy.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5311253315426197874" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 268px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_I5sAw5gkZtM/SbVcwAoYIXI/AAAAAAAAFuE/aXwYOdcztOI/s400/003+copy.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />This is a moment from the annual banquet for Crossroads Crisis Pregnancy Center her in Rochester, MI. I had the pleasure of having my name dropped in a hat when they were looking for a photographer for their annual Walk-a-thon this past summer and I was asked to come back to photograph the banquet. The annual banquet is a big fundraiser for the center and they had over 750 guests! It was an amazing and blessed event. The key-note speaker was none other than, Nick Vujicic!<br /><br />You can read Nick's story here: <a href="http://www.lifewithoutlimbs.org/">http://www.lifewithoutlimbs.org/</a>.<br /><br />And watch this incredible Youtube video here...<br /><object height="344" width="425"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/3sHyzatcBq8&hl=en&fs=1"><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/3sHyzatcBq8&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />Nick is a phenominal man of God and a true blessing to every person he encounters! </p><p>The Crossroads Crisis Pregnancy center's work is so important to me because of how my family began. I was fifteen when I met my husband and we began to date. At the age of sixteen, I came home with him one evening to inform my parent's that they were expecting their first grandchild. Married at the age of seventeen and the rest, as they say, is history. </p><p>I can't explain why, but abortion was not an option for me. But, this isn't the case for so many woman and teens who face the trauma of an unexpected pregnancy every day in this city, state, and across the country. I had two warm and supportive families to turn to, mine and Todd's. When they say "it takes a village" it isn't merely a cliche. I'll continue to contribute my prayers, time, and talents to an orgization that is so near and dear to me and stand alongside them as they nurture one soul at a time.</p><p>The center is in existance for this reason...</p><p>They are an organization of people who care about you! As an organization of concerned Christians, they are committed to helping you deal with the critical life issues surrounding your pregnancy. Whether you are single or married, whether your pregnancy was planned or not, whether this is your first pregnancy or not, they are there to help. They offer physical, emotional, and spiritual support to all regardless of marital status, religion, gender, age, or race.<br />The trained staff and volunteers can provide you with:<br />Pregnancy testing<br />Limited ultrasound<br />Pregnancy counseling<br />STD Information<br />Abortion Information<br />Fetal development information<br />Prenatal health care info.<br />Adoption information<br />Medical referrals<br />Childbirth and infant care training<br />Assistance with maternity and baby<br />clothing and other needs<br />and perhaps the most important,Post-abortion counseling<br /><br /></p><p></p><p>To make a donation to The Crisis Pregnancy Center click here: <a href="http://www.crossroadspregnancy.com/donor/">http://www.crossroadspregnancy.com/donor/</a>.</p><p>So who do I tag...</p><p>Leslie over at <a href="http://leslieautumn.blogspot.com/">My Happily Ever After</a>.</p><p>Erica over at <a href="http://ericamarie00.blogspot.com/">Talk a Walk in My Shoes</a>.</p><p><a href="http://our-rockstar-family.blogspot.com/">Circle of Life</a>.</p><p>Wendy at <a href="http://miraculouschaos.blogspot.com/">Everyday Miracles</a>.</p><p>And, Melissa over at <a href="http://clem4fam.blogspot.com/">Home is your story begins</a>.</p>Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-3622903745988870172009-03-04T04:53:00.000-08:002009-03-04T05:23:59.411-08:00Humble Beginnings...My parent's took off nice and early for the airport this morning; they're headed for Okinawa, Japan. Man, I can't tell you how happy I am for them. I didn't grow up in a family where we traveled to amazing places or crossed continents so this is super huge for them. I have a younger brother in the United States Marine Corp. Ooohrah! Gosh, gets me every time! I can't talk about him without welling up. I'm just so gosh darn proud! Anyhoo, he is stationed in Okinawa with his wife Lisa, my niece Alyssa, and nephew M.J. (Murray John Young III, I know, amazing).<br /><br />Both my parent's worked growing up; we were a typical working class family. We spent our winter and Easter breaks off school at the babysitters house; not Disneyland. I know, I'm so deprived, right! Actually, no. My parent's spent every dime they earned to clothe us and keep us in the extra curricular activities we chose like soccer, football, and dance. They attended every soccer and football game and as I got older and became a cheerleader they'd come watch me cheer and wouldn't dream of missing a competition for dance or cheerleading. We didn't travel much and when we did, we camped. So packing up the family, being allowed to bring a friend along, and stay a few days in Chicago for a dance competition was incredible. We didn't stay in hotels! And who cares if we brought along my loud cousin who was so proud of me you can hear her screaming my name in every single video. And who cares if she used to come with my mom to pick me up acting like a physically handicapped person to embarrass me. Not that being physically handicapped should be but I hope you get my point.<br /><br />I couldn't appreciate just how much of themselves they put into giving my brothers and I everything we wanted. In last week's sermon, Pastor talked about how when you buy something you are giving a piece of yourself and your life away for it. You are trading a part of you to own something in return. Just like Christ did for us, he paid with his own blood for our salvation. They put their blood, sweat, and time away from us into their work in exchange for a paycheck then put all of the money they earned into giving us everything we needed, wanted, and then some. I truly didn't fully understand that until this morning thinking about how much this trip to Japan must mean to them. Not only are they going to visit their son and family whom they haven't seen in nearly two years but they are leaving the continent. That's just crazy to me.<br /><br />I'm sure both my brothers would agree that our favorite memories of growing up include our camping trips and next in line is probably dinner time. We drove my mother crazy but we laughed until some of us peed or fell out of chairs. Sadly, mealtime with my own children is much the same, only, what's sad is it totally drives me nuts! You shouldn't screw around at the dinner table! And, wouldn't you know it, Dad is still the ring leader of the circus.<br /><br />My bond, respect, honor, and appreciation for my parent's has grown leaps and bounds in recent months. I can't even articulate my thoughts properly. As a parent myself, I know now how much of themselves they have vested in us. Looking back, I've been a pretty ungrateful brat. And yet again, they have opened their hearts and home to us. Not do we just live here, but they insist it isn't their home but <em>our</em> home. And you know what, it is home. I know we are exactly where we are supposed to be for this season and there is so much grace upon us. Who knows mom and dad, you just might become born-again Christians! Yes, they believe in God but not religion, not that I blame them. I don't believe in religion either.<br /><br />So it's no wonder that when my husband and I had to chose between our annual trip to Florida in March and a handful of weekends of camping this summer, we chose camping. The kids chose camping. Florida is amazing, it's my favorite place. Standing on the shoreline of the ocean in the warm air, and the sun on my face is absolutely my favorite place. It makes me so happy just thinking about it. Walks on the beach every morning, spending the day with the kids in a pool that has a temperature set at 90 degrees, sunsets, eating out, shopping, sand castles, and watching the kids play in the waves, and sadly the kids smashing the sand creations that others have left behind. Man, it's a priceless week. But this year we're going the humble route and we'll have just as much fun and create the kind of memories I have from my childhood.<br /><br />Out of everything we've endured and lost and learned over the last 8 1/2 months, the camper is one thing we've held onto. The kids truly love it and the time we have in the parks away from home, tv, and video games. Not to mention, the marshmallows! It's been 8 1/2 months since our family has had some time to just hang out alone so Faith was kicking and screaming after my parent's left. She'll miss them but is really excited to see what it will be like with just our family in the house. Karli was in tears, Mallory and Hailey were just excited to get ahold of the markers they got yesterday, and Tyler I think was walking in his sleep. We all can't wait for them to arrive safely so they can call us on the web cam and we can see em' hanging out in Japan with my brother and his family. You know what else is really funny, of all the things my brother could have planned for them to do during their visit, they are going camping! My mom doesn't yet know she'll need some leaves and to search for the hole in the ground that serves as a restroom but oh well...kidding!<br /><br />Murray, Lisa, Alyssa, M.J. - miss you and love you guys so much! Have a fantastic couple of weeks and soak it all in! Mom, Dad, be safe and may the Lord's protective angels keep you surrounded! Love you guys!<br /><br />And I have to say to my brother Kevin and sister-in-law and friend Erica, that after what I've endured I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that everything will be okay! I'm equally as proud of the two of you. The Lord is faithful and all your dreams will come true! If I spend the rest of my life lifting you up in prayer, you will have it all! I love you both!<br /><br />Muah! xoxo - KariKari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-25167495462658994282009-03-02T06:39:00.001-08:002009-03-02T07:53:57.702-08:00Habby Birthday Hubs!Today is Todd's birthday and I just wanted to share a bit of him with all of you today; a few of things I love most about him.<br /><br />In reading through Mark this morning a scripture jumped out at me. It's one I've read before, blogged about before, and one that should set a standard of living for Christians. <em>Mark 11:45 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.</em> Todd definitely has a servants heart. I think it's the virtue that always stands out most in my mind when I think about Todd's character. He is truly selfless. In order to be a great leader you must first be a servant. My husband has clearly demonstrated this Christ-like character in our home and set a wonderful example for our son to follow.<br /><br />But, what does the bible say about a virtuous man? Many of us know Proverbs 31 or have at least heard it once or twice; the virtuous woman but what about men. What does the Lord consider to be virtuous in a man?<br /><br />A virtuous man will always accept the Lord's plan for his life. Todd and I have been through some pretty steep trials in our marriage and life and through the highs and lows he has been a solid rock. It does not mean he is without sin or that he's obtained perfection but he gracefully accepts his flaws and brings them to the throne.<br /><br />I think because of Todd's attitude the Lord has always had an abundance of grace upon him. My dad likes to say "Todd is the only person I know who can fall in a pile of crap and come out smelling like a rose." As I grow older and even more so during this season of living with my parent's again, it's become abundantly obvious that this is the attitude my father has always had toward my mom.<br /><br />A virtuous man will be know for his honorable character. Others will speak highly of the virtuous man's honorable character. They will respect him and his judgment. Even the unsaved will speak well of a godly man. They may not like what he stands for, but his honorable character will be known. He will be known for his honesty, integrity and his willingness to help others.<br /><br />The virtuous man will control his eyes and thoughts against lustful glances and ideas, abstain from evil works, and will be willing for the Lord to examine his life. Willing to have his life open for inspection by God and man; knows the Lord will examine his every thought and action, and he acts accordingly. The virtuous man will not be controlled by his heart's desires. Todd does not follow his heart but leads it. Todd has dreams of his own but the weight of providing for his family first and foremost has caused him to be diligent and patient and unwilling to take unnecessary risks so that the Lord can bring those dreams to life in his perfect timing.<br /><br /><em>Matthew 5:43 Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. 44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; 45 That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust.</em><br /><em></em><br />The virtuous man will not work at getting even with those whom he feels has done him wrong. He will not be glad when trouble overtakes those he has had a conflict with. Todd will always be the first person in my complaints to stop me in my tracks and tell me to pray for them.<br /><br />And finally, the virtuous man will not try to hide his sins. Todd will also tell you that the power of sin is in it's secrecy. Not only does he confess his sins to the Lord but he shares his secrets with me. Both of us as a couple have had many a conversation with other couples where we've shared our mistakes, our sins, and our pitfalls to help other couples work past their hardships. I guess this also goes back to accepting God's plan for our lives. Every trial we have endured, be it the Lord's will, due to submitting to temptation, or making mistakes, has shaped us into the people we are today. It's all a part of our testimony. There are things in our lives that make no sense but if it's something Todd or I must endure in order to help another down the line then it will have been worth it. The Lord uses everything in our lives for his glory, if we let him.<br /><br />Todd is the spiritual leader of our home. He prays for me and for our children. He is an excellent provider and puts our needs above his own, always. Todd is a man of great character, a man of his word, and the most selfless person I've ever known. He is full of integrity, ambition, and charm. He can talk an Eskimo into buying ice cubes and leave the man feeling like he got the best deal in town and like he's made a new life long friend. Todd listens to what people around him are truly saying and guides them to the biblical principles that can help them and provides books and tools to help them along the way. If he knows a man whose marriage is in trouble, he doesn't jump on the complaint bandwagon with him, he'll uplift the man, his wife, and their marriage to help him see that it's worth fighting for. Yes, the hubs is an honorable and virtuous man. He sets a high standard and a solid godly example.<br /><br />What I adore most about Todd is how deeply, unconditionally, and profoundly he loves; not just me but our children and those around us. <em>1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Love is patient, kind, not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth win out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.</em> These verses epitomize Todd's character in our marriage. And, I've gotta be honest with you, I have no idea how he's done it for this long and with such patience because Lord knows, I am not that virtuous. What's really awesome about him is, he'll read this and be like "whaaaaaaat????" he's so humble he has no idea just how awesome he is!<br /><br />Thank you Todd for everything you are! Happy, Happy Birthday!Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-87476152175268221262009-02-26T06:14:00.000-08:002009-02-26T07:06:32.096-08:00Use your faith, not your muscles.Galations 3:2-5 NLT<br />2. Let me ask you this one question: Did you receive the Holy Spirit by obeying the law of Moses? Of course not! You received the Spirit because you believed the message you heard about Christ. 3. How foolish can you be? After starting your Christian lives in the Spirit, why are you now trying to become perfect by your own human effort? 4. Have you experienced so much for nothing? Surely it was not in vain was it? 5. I ask you again, does God give you the Holy Spirit and work miracles among you because you obey the law? Of course not! It is because you believe the message you heard about Christ.<br /><br />Yesterday morning a friend of mine was heavy on my heart and I felt led to share a few things with her. Her family has been effected by our economy and though she is grateful for the blessings in her life, she is looking to the Lord to meet her needs. I sent her an e-mail and shared a few scriptures and words of encouragement and it filled my soul. This is what I was created for. To love and worship my creator and share his love with those around me. To lay your life down and to be willing to do his will provides such blessing and satisfaction. I'm blessed to have had the opportunity to share his love and my experiences with her and blessed again because should a day come when I need a word of encouragement she'll be the first I'll hear from. I didn't do it because I know I'll need her some day but there is something very rewarding that can only come from a Godly bond.<br /><br />I continue to stand in the gap for her. My first prayer for her is that she be strengthened and filled with his peace that surpasses all understanding (Phillipians: 6 & 7). Secondly, that he not just meet her needs but that her cup runneth over. That she does not hold tight to her blessings and be held in the bondage of fear and lack but meets the needs of others around her where she can. Luke 38:6 Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full - pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back. May the Lord no simply meet her needs but exceed them. May he show up and show off so that those around her will see his presence and love in her life and know it is the Lord's hand at work in her life.<br /><br />The scripture in Galatians reminds me of the many times I have carried my own burdens and tried to do it all on my own. The most recent is a situation of conflict. In the beginning I laid it on the alter, at the foot of the cross. I left it there for a few months but it kept glaring back at me. There wasn't enough closure for <em>me</em> but still I continued to leave it up to the Lord to work it out. Until, one day without even thinking I picked that bad boy back up off the alter, threw it on my back, and stormed outta there to get it done. I took matters into my own hands. Let me just tell you, it didn't work out. In the beginning, I had done what the Lord would have asked me personally to do, I did what he did by example. And though every detail hadn't been unturned, there really was closure and more importantly God's love could shine through. But, when I picked it back up, it soooo didn't work out. I lost all my dignity. I laid on the floor like a two-year-old kicking and screaming and insisting it be my way! I didn't walk in love. Oh, there is closure now for sure. Not the peaceful ending I envisioned and I certainly didn't anticipate making such a fool of myself and an ever bigger mess than there was to start with. Now instead of peace and knowing I have fulfilled his will for that situation, there is shame and regret.<br /><br />We all need to remember that we have gained so much in this life by faith. Because the Lord is our helper. Because of divine intervention. We can't go around flexing our muscles and trying to perfect ourselves and the things in this life without that same faith, help, and divine intervention. Keep your eyes on him today. Seek his will for your life. And for pete's sake! If he holds up a stop sign, trust me, stop! Wait until he says it's time to go. In the meantime, praise him while you wait. So if you are looking to change yourself, a situation, or anything else in your life. Seek the Lord first and use your faith and patience to get it done. Another thing I shared with this friend earlier this week is that we are not meant to be enough. We are not meant to be all things to all people all the time. We absolutely need his presence and the gifts of the spirit in our lives daily!<br /><br />I gained much insight into forgiveness this last week and have more to share in the coming posts. Although I am burdened with the way I behaved and may never have the forgiveness I seek from those around me in this life, I'm grateful to have the Lord's forgiveness. I used to just sort of toss around the idea of my forgiveness. But, this week it all became real. His level of grace and mercy and the love required to do so unconditionally is something I can't wrap my brain around but it is who He is. I'm grateful, thankful, blessed, and forgiven. There is no grace for the things we do on our own, or the Lord is at least not obligated to clean up after us. Sometimes, we make a mess and we just have to live with the results.<br /><br />I added a new song to the playlist this morning. Slow Fade by Casting Crowns. I've been looking inward at the areas of sin in my life and the impact it has had on me, my relationship with the Lord, my marriage, and the example it sets for my children. This song is a reminder of how my life arrived in the areas of temptation to start with. It is indeed a slow fade. It starts with one look, one cracked door, and the process of being desensitized begins and before you know it you are staring temptation right in the face. <em>The journey from your mind to your hands will show up in your thinking</em>, wow, there is so much power and truth in that. There are some things that are just too shameful and too personal to publicize on my blog but know I have held the hand of sin and the whole gamut of emotions that come with it: shame, guilt, and the bondage that ties you there. But, hallelujah! I have found forgiveness and unconditional love! So can you!Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-50397683903308050292009-02-23T08:57:00.001-08:002009-02-23T09:28:51.245-08:00The hubs and the daddyI have a journal I picked up at the Christian book store before Christmas titled <em>Closer to Your Husband</em> and since I totally skipped over Valentine's Day I'd like to share a recent entry.<br /><br />The prompt for this particular day was regarding conversation and couldn't have come at a better time. It is truly my belief that a coincidence is when God chooses to remain anonymous. In other words, there are no coincidences.<br /><br />2/19/09<br />I have come to realize that our communication and how easy it is to talk to each other has always been what bonds us together. It is something I have taken for granted but I have a fresh perspective now and truly know how vital conversation is to our marriage. Talking and wearing our hearts on our sleeve really does connect us in a profound way. It deepens our love. It forms strength, love, trust, and intimacy. It allows us to share our faults, short-comings, and insecurities. It allows us to take that vulnerability and display trust, support, unconditional love, and reassurance. I can't recall a time when I've shared an insecurity or opened my heart to you and you disappointed me or weren't careful with my heart.<br /><br />Lord, help me to always have in the forefront of my mind the importance of communication. Help me to always know that my husband is gentle, forgiving, kind, and empathetic. That I can trust him with my feelings, thoughts, dreams, and fears. Help me to always be vulnerable, open, and honest. To trust my heart to my husband. Help me to be patient, kind, caring, empathetic, and attuned to Todd's needs as well. Conversation does reveal the inner person and I pray Lord that you continue to use our conversations to unite us, to create trust, safety, comfort, and intimacy. Amen!<br /><br />Listen, for I have worthy things to say; I open my lips to speak what is right. Proverbs 8:6 NIV<br /><br />It's easy when you first meet someone to never run out of things to talk about. Everything is new, fresh, and exciting. You are drawn to that person and want to uncover and savour every detail. Sustaining that excitement, that interest, and that desire, and level of intimacy can become a challenge. Balancing each other's needs with work, family, and community commitments is also a challenge.<br /><br />For Todd and I it's been an interesting journey. He was raised in a home where he and his mom talked about everything and in my home we all found sharing our feelings much more difficult. It wasn't a safety zone for me. And although I've come a long way through the example Todd has set, I still find it easy to revert back to my own ways. Our personalities are also not defined as most men and woman would be. The hubs is more like the attention craving poodle in the home. He likes to have his ego stroked and well, he likes to be pet. What can I say? He requires physical touch and words of affirmation. That's just how the Lord shaped him. It's been challenging for me to express my love for him in a way that he receives it when it is so outside of my comfort box. But, he has been patient and kind. He discovered a way to meet my needs long before I even knew what my needs were and he's wonderful to me in every possible way. Neither of us would have been able to find our way to this place or overcome as much as we have without finding a way to fight fair, communicate, and of course tons of the Lord's grace and mercy.<br /><br />I adore my man and he adores me. I miss him when he's at work or school and can't sit next to him without touching. I love holding his hand, rubbing his bald head, and when he squeezes me so hard it hurts. I loved being out last week with Mallory and Hailey last week for their birthday and the number of times the three of us said "daddy." He's not just a presence in our home. The one that creates and enforces the rules. The one who works then contributes nothing. He is my rock, my best friend, my biggest fan, my lover, and the greatest listener. But, not only is he wonderful to me but he is their "daddy."Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-2776726110745659662009-02-20T06:38:00.000-08:002009-02-20T07:10:12.709-08:00Eternity Has ArrivedI abandoned my own blog for a week and have to admit I've not been keeping up with the blogs I typically read either; I have some catching up to do. I've got a lot of projects in the works, my munchkins are all home from school for the week for winter break, and we spent the day with Mallory and Hailey for their birthday on Wednesday. I've said this so many times this week but I thought the day would never come. When they were born, the age of five seemed an eternity away. They've transitioned from being babies to being toddlers and now from being toddlers to being little girls. The pair of them are a couple of the brightest kids I've ever known and there is so much about this time in their lives that I want to remember.<br /><br />They totally and completely look up to their older sisters and brother without a doubt. They are daddy's girls and Tyler is their hero. They both love everything Faith and Karli love, from High School Musical, Hannah Montana, and The Jonas Brothers, to the silly clapping songs they learn at school that Faith and Karli teach them. They run around the house singing "bang, bang choo- choo train, wind me up, I do my thang..." on and on daily because the big girls do. Faith and Karli have taught them every word to the Taylor Swift hit Romeo and Juliet. I pray daily that they find their Prince Charming and their happily ever after. They said a girl chooses a man like her father so all my girls will be in excellent shape. Their future husbands have big shoes to fill.<br /><br />They each have their own strengths and their own personalities. Mallory is strong and outgoing, a leader, and a bit bossy. Hailey, compared to her peers at school, is also a strong leader but much more passive at home. But each of them are always willing to share, trade, and make sacrifices for the other. Mallory is a bit ahead of Hailey in the learning curve at school. She recognizes a few more letters and numbers than Hailey, but Hailey can swim the length of a pool by herself. She's never taken a swim class and her daddy has taught her everything she knows. I think she's a natural.<br /><br />They are both entertainers at heart. Hailey especially loves to make us laugh. They each have their own little quirky things they pull out of their hats at any given moment and before long they have us all in stitches. Dinner time is a riot around here. They love to sing and dance.<br /><br />I want to always remember what it's like when we snuggle. They're my snugglebugs. I want to always remember how sweet their voice is at this age. The way they pick up a tune so easily like their Mama. The way a song just rises out of their spirits and they make up the words and sing to Jesus. I want to remember the twinkle in their eye and pray it never goes away. I pray that they grow up to be not only hearers of the word but doers also. I pray they grow to be kind, empathetic, and loving woman.<br /><br />The pair of them have filled our hearts and our lives with such blessing. With so much joy; joy unspeakable. As much as the two of them are a package they are separate individuals and I pray that I have the strength and guidance to support them when it comes time for them to feel separate and be different. That they always know how special they are as individuals. That the Lord blessed us with them both on the same day merely five minutes apart but he has gifted them uniquely and has a unique design for each of their lives. Funny, at this age they think they have to grow up and marry twins! Who knows, there is a cute set of five-year-old boys that live next door. I pray they always know how special they each are to all of us.<br /><br />I'm especially proud of my older children. We don't seem to have the "youngest sibling" factor in our family. The older three are just as blessed by them both as my husband and I are as parents. They each have already demonstrated how nurturing and caring they are and I know that having siblings so much younger will help form them into wonderful parents themselves.<br /><br />One thing I've learned along the way...don't let your children sleep in your bed! This has always been sort of a rule for us but when the kids are sick or other circumstances exist, I'm willing to make an exception. Until this week. Mallory has had a bad cough and is having a tough time sleeping so she's crawled into bed with us a few times this week. Well, Hailey wakes up and sees her missing so she climbs in as well. Before long, I wake up sandwiched between my stocky husband and a toddlers butt cheek with another ones legs across my torso. No more sleepovers!<br /><br />I saw a headline on MSN.com about some essays that people had written titled "How lucky am I to have so much to lose." The conversations in my home recently have been deep and challenging but the Lord has guided those chats and broken down walls and barriers. I am truly blessed with a new revelation of just how blessed I am. I could not ask for more.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-79163388126406822612009-02-10T10:10:00.001-08:002009-02-10T10:30:38.954-08:00Keep Dancing!It is crazy what a touch of warmth outside and lots of sunshine can do for a soul. I feel great this week <em>and</em> I'm getting a lot done too. I typically start laundry on Monday and it takes me all week to get it done, but I already folded and put away my last load and I've only got a few things to iron for the hubs. The carpet has been vacuumed. The windows and bathroom are clean. The sun is beaming in the windows. It's awesome.<br /><br />I took advantage of the lack of chill in the air yesterday and photographed a few things in the backyard. It's incredible how gorgeous nature can be even in death. I'm so excited for the first spring flowers to spring up. I'm not naive enough to think that 30 degrees won't turn but a girl can hope right?<br /><br />Mallory and Hailey are playing quietly in their own bedroom. That hasn't happened in eight months and it is quite refreshing for them to have their own space.<br /><br />While folding I was watching <em>Color Splash</em> on HGTV hosted by David Bromstead who one a season of <em>Design Star</em>. David is an utter genius. I love every room I have seen him makeover and he covers every inch and every detail. He checks out the client's home and really listens to what they hope for the redo then brings it to life. What I love most is at every reveal he is always so unsure of himself; so humble. He is so talented and completely unaware of it. Actually, maybe he is aware of his talent but could be better phrased by saying he really wants to ensure that it's exactly what the client had in mind. I draw so much creativity and inspiration from him and I would love to get my hands on a room of my own. In due time though.<br /><br />David's attitude reminds me of my own. It isn't enough for me to trust my technical skill behind the camera. It is so much more important to me that the bond, love, and relationships are transferred and brought to life in each image. I used to be the most insecure and shy person on the planet. Now I'm confident in my technical ability and truly love meeting new people and getting to know who they are and what they mean to each other to create lasting memories. The Lord has blessed me in an amazing way, pulled me out of my shell, my box, and in a way I never thought would have been possible. The aspirations He has for us greatly supersede what we ever think is possible for ourselves.<br /><br />What's that new song playing? I heard it on the radio this morning and it totally won my heart. Though I'm not twenty and still looking for my dream the rest is utterly true for me. Yeah I'm full of dents and tears but grateful for every war wound because in the end I have found me. Not only have I found myself, I have finally grown into being proud of who I am and no longer apologizing for any of it. My reflection cast off of other people's opinions was a pure state of bondage. I said I was over it many, many times but today I can finally say <em><strong><span style="font-size:180%;">I am free!</span></strong></em> Free to be me!<br /><br />This life has been a dance. The music may skip and the steps may change but the melody goes on and we keep moving. Keep dancing!Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-47100947265359900002009-02-09T09:16:00.001-08:002009-02-09T09:51:05.585-08:00My ProviderThere is so much going on around here lately; it's starting to get a bit overwhelming again. The hubs is in the process of switching my server so I can finally debut karidawsonphotography.com. Until now it's just been a splash page for clients to get to my photo blog and client proofing areas. But, no more, I've got a full blown web site! So exciting!<br /><br />The weather finally broke around here this weekend. It was 40 degrees and it seemed so glorious. The sun was shining. It was truly a welcome change and great to finally defrost. I was hoping to head outside with Faith this weekend for her turn at updating her pictures but it didn't work out. Saturday is always such a crazy day for us. We try to squeeze in something fun with the family but have to head back for an early dinner. Our church services are on Saturday evenings temporarily so the day goes so fast. I shot for Sunday but Mom and Dad threw a wrench in those plans with a big surprise for Faith and Karli. More on that in a sec.<br /><br />Just a couple of other small things. I finished up the jacket for Tyler's polish dance costume and he was photographed in it last week. Now I'm working on skirts for my four girls for recital. I've got one done but hmph, three more to go. I've got a stack of my own clothes that still need to be altered in some way that I'm hoping to finish up this week as well. Then I'll be ready to whip up something to finish off Faith and Karli's surprise. I'm trying to make sure I photograph every day and keeping up on my Flickr stream, contacts, and groups, has been fun but time consuming. It's worth it though. I'm learning so much and meeting tons of new people. I've got my first portrait party coming up this month and have some loose ends to tie up for that. Mallory and Hailey are celebrating their fifth birthday next week so plans are in the works for that. I think that about covers all the craziness.<br /><br />Many of you know that eight months ago, our family made the move from our home into my parent's house. Partly due to unforeseen economical issues and partly due to bad decision making. Anyway, that first few months were super tough. Pride is a tough thing to swallow and it took me a long time to choke it down. I'm the oldest child and typical type 'a' personality, perfectionist and all. So admitting I had failed at something was difficult enough. Admitting I need help from my parents to see my way out of it was a whole new ball game for me. They have been awesome and welcomed us with open arms and have never made us feel like we've overstayed our welcome or that they're trying to edge us out. Actually, the idea of moving on makes them each shudder.<br /><br />Our four girls have been sharing one bedroom with Tyler in his own. This has been especially tough on Karli, the middle child, because Mallory and Hailey just adore everything she owns. Her toys, her clothes, her jewelry, her make-up. Therefore, they are constantly getting into it. Getting homework done in the bedroom is tough with a 4-year-old climbing on your bed constantly and annoying you. My two oldest girls were desperate for their own space.<br /><br />The most challenging part for all of us during our stay at the Young residence has been that we do often feel like we're all on top of each other. I try to keep the kids playing in areas where they aren't overwhelming my Mom and Dad and in their spaces all the time. Although, really, my parent's wouldn't hear of it anyway. It seemed for a while like there was no place for any of them to escape to.<br /><br />Well, my parent's decide this weekend, spur of the moment, that Sunday morning we were going to build a bedroom for Faith and Karli. It just so happened that each of them were away for sleepovers Saturday night and we had the day to pull it off. By the time they both got home we had the new room complete except for the project I have for them. Furniture was in, pictures were up, beds were made, and it was all theirs. I also managed to get Mallory and Hailey's room rearranged and moved their pictures and belongings around to accommodate them as well. All four girls are pleased and punch to say the least. Mallory and Hailey of course are super tempted to cross the threshold of the one area of the house that is completely off limits but so far they're minding. There are two temporary walls in the bedroom that are bare so I'm going to make some fabric panels for those walls. I think in the long run it will pull the room together, make it unique, and demonstrate a bit of the girls likes and personalities.<br /><br />I'm incredibly grateful to my parent's. They are willing to stop at nothing to accommodate us and spoil their grandchildren completely rotten! I actually quite like our living arrangements and so grateful to have the Lords' grace upon us for this season. For he is certainly in control. He is Jehovah Jirah, which means he literally knows our need and makes provisions to accommodate that need before the need even arises! Awesome stuff! He knows the road ahead and what each next step will be for us. Todd has been working hard earning his bachelor's degree and it seemed like he was going to have to continue to take classes until next December instead of finishing up in May. Well with a little divine intervention for financial aid and a dash of answered prayer in the scheduling area Todd WILL finish in May. I'm so proud of him. He's working super hard, pulling all 'A's' and remaining on the Dean's List. He attends school at least two nights per week, works full time, and has 3-day classes that are 8-hours each at least two weekends per month. It's a sacrifice but one that I'm certain will pay off. I also know I would never be able to handle it if I didn't have the company and assistance of my parent's. God is in control! He proves himself daily.Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4847753655004150557.post-83450062671906537222009-02-02T10:00:00.000-08:002009-02-04T08:06:40.234-08:00I've got quick learners folks!So Karli has this really cute pair of corduroy pants. I think they're cute, she despises them. She also has this super cute shirt. It's thermal looking in creme with a small floral print on it. Sewn together with it is a short sleeved blue shirt so it looks like a twofor but it's really just one. Sounds cute and comfy, no? Karli despises this shirt more than the cute pants.<br /><br /><br /><br />Karli is only willing to wear the cute clothes. I packed her bag for a sleep over at Grandma's house. Yeah, I packed the cute pants and the cute shirt. She hated them and wore and came home in her pj's because she refused to put on the clothes I love and packed for her. So, Monday came around and guess what, she wore what I packed for Grandma's house. She wasn't happy about it, in fact, I think she said she hates me even. Oh well.<br /><br /><br /><br />So this past weekend, I packed for another sleepover and Grandma's house. Yeah, I packed the same pair of cute pants. I gave her a shirt she likes though. She came home in the cute clothes I had packed for her this time. Karli comes in and says "you know I told Grandma, the next time I sleep over and I don't like what mom packed for me, make me wear them anyway. Because if I don't, I have to wear them to school the next day."<br /><br /><br /><br />I held my belly laugh deep down with me and just politely said "oh that's nice Karli, I'm glad you got dressed today and those pants aren't so bad are they." So now I can let out my muaaahhhhh of a laugh. I love it when they catch on quick!Kari Dawsonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05126367022113250883noreply@blogger.com3